On April 7th, my ex and I were divorced for 21 years (at 1:39 p.m.). I usually celebrate that day. Lol
It just so happened that I was really feeling down and stressed that day last week over financial stuff...one of them being that my son still owes me so much money and has not made much of an effort to repay. He doesn't make a lot in hourly wages on his job and mostly relies on good tips, but tips have not been good recently. They are expected to pick up. Regardless, he could have been making an effort to give me something so that I would know his heart was in the right place, and he didn't. Naturally, when bills pile up or I need something I can't afford, I blame it on that. It's not all his fault but if I had a fraction of what he owes me, things would be easier.
I was so stressed that I called his father who lives out of state and told him about it. Honestly, I rarely call that man unless it is to tell him of another of his son's shenanagans. He usually ends up annoying me so much that I hang up on him, blaming me for things, etc. I don't need the blame game. I basically raised both of our kids from the ages of 3 and 5 alone with no positive input from him. All I ever got from him was negative criticism and blame; if it wasn't that, he was undermining my authority with our son.
But this time he was different. He listened and took my side. He called our son twice and apparently talked to him about how he doesn't appreciate me and all I have done for him. He talked to him about repaying me and how he should be making more of an effort to help me around the house, etc. Our son didn't argue with him and agreed that he owes me a lot.
Then my ex called me back. He THANKED me for taking care of our son for the past 3 years since he moved back home with me, throughout his worst addiction period and withdrawal phase. He THANKED me for doing such a good job in raising both of our children. He told me he knew that none of our son's problems were the result of anything I did or didn't do. Everything he said sounded heartfelt. I couldn't believe my ears.
I never ever thought the man would thank me. I almost fainted. Lol And the strangest part of all was that after we hung up, I thanked God for letting that conversation take place because now, 21 years later, I can finally let all of the grudges against him go and forgive him. I really and truly thought I would carry them to my grave!
And to top it all off, he sent me a check for $300 to help me out! I was astonished when I received it! This is the same man would not give me one dime extra in addition to the measly child support he paid to help with our children's expenses while they grew up! And now he sends me $300 to help me out of a rough patch?!
So I just thought I would tell you all that miracles CAN happen. Lol!
It just so happened that I was really feeling down and stressed that day last week over financial stuff...one of them being that my son still owes me so much money and has not made much of an effort to repay. He doesn't make a lot in hourly wages on his job and mostly relies on good tips, but tips have not been good recently. They are expected to pick up. Regardless, he could have been making an effort to give me something so that I would know his heart was in the right place, and he didn't. Naturally, when bills pile up or I need something I can't afford, I blame it on that. It's not all his fault but if I had a fraction of what he owes me, things would be easier.
I was so stressed that I called his father who lives out of state and told him about it. Honestly, I rarely call that man unless it is to tell him of another of his son's shenanagans. He usually ends up annoying me so much that I hang up on him, blaming me for things, etc. I don't need the blame game. I basically raised both of our kids from the ages of 3 and 5 alone with no positive input from him. All I ever got from him was negative criticism and blame; if it wasn't that, he was undermining my authority with our son.
But this time he was different. He listened and took my side. He called our son twice and apparently talked to him about how he doesn't appreciate me and all I have done for him. He talked to him about repaying me and how he should be making more of an effort to help me around the house, etc. Our son didn't argue with him and agreed that he owes me a lot.
Then my ex called me back. He THANKED me for taking care of our son for the past 3 years since he moved back home with me, throughout his worst addiction period and withdrawal phase. He THANKED me for doing such a good job in raising both of our children. He told me he knew that none of our son's problems were the result of anything I did or didn't do. Everything he said sounded heartfelt. I couldn't believe my ears.
I never ever thought the man would thank me. I almost fainted. Lol And the strangest part of all was that after we hung up, I thanked God for letting that conversation take place because now, 21 years later, I can finally let all of the grudges against him go and forgive him. I really and truly thought I would carry them to my grave!
And to top it all off, he sent me a check for $300 to help me out! I was astonished when I received it! This is the same man would not give me one dime extra in addition to the measly child support he paid to help with our children's expenses while they grew up! And now he sends me $300 to help me out of a rough patch?!
So I just thought I would tell you all that miracles CAN happen. Lol!
